I'M PREGNANT!
LOL, OK. I know that's not news, especially not to me.
Today, I had another revelation...
I FEEL pregnant.
That's a first.
When I was in Detroit last month, I was already showing (yes, at 9-12 weeks). But it was that "is she pregnant or just fat" kind of showing.
Now I'm actually really showing. I figured it out this morning when I was at work. I went to use the restroom and as I was pulling up my insanely stupid maternity pants I saw it... my belly. It was round. Seriously.
As I waddled back to my office, I realized I was waddling. No longer walking so much... more waddling like a duck. A duck who can walk in a straight line.
Needless to say, being pregnant is not fun for me. Are there any women out there who LIKED being pregnant? Do I have something to look forward to?
My friend, Joanna (you know, the Soulful Coach), promised me that my second trimester would be blissful. WTF! Why am I not blissful??? Why am I crankier than my grandma?? I'm hot and cold all the time; I eat wickedly weird foods together (like a Nestle Crunch ice cream bar with salt and pepper potato chips); I pee every five minutes (over share?); AND breathing is harder.
WHY IS BREATHING SO HARD??
Whew. OK. The angst is out but why am I so angsty? I feel like Mary the Federal Marshall on In Plain Sight. Yeah, you know who I'm talking about. I'm her. Right. Now.
Anyone got a valium? I kid. I kid.
Suggestions please!!!
2 comments:
Sorry hon, I dont have any suggesting as I've never been pregnant but you made me laugh so hard with this post!
I hope this whole pregnant thing gets 'happier' for you & hopefully your breathing will get easier, ha ha.
Yeah I don't so much understand the women who love being pregnant...because in the next breath, they are rattling off all the things that are so horrible, like hemorrhoids! lol
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