What's It Like Being a Whiny Anglo

A friend of mine wrote a post about her experiences in Israel. Her post was refreshing because as immigrants, we come here with blinders on. We believe that since we're Jewish, living in the Holy Land will be some kind of spiritual experience! Yet, reality sets in. For my friend, S, life here kind of imploded. She uses her writing as a way to deal with her feelings (because it's an awesome outlet). Her words didn't exactly bring her any comfort.

One commenter wrote that she's tired of the 'whiny Anglos' and told us to 'deal'. Well, dear reader, we are not whiny but we are Anglos.

Then again, who am I to talk? I'm leaving this country and returning home. After six years I've had enough. Everything here has been a struggle for me. Besides not feeling accepted, I can barely make ends meet on two pay checks. I got married here but my wedding didn't count because it wasn't through the Rabbinate office (so we got hitched in Cyprus). I couldn't get married here because I'm just not Jewish enough. Yet, if I ever want to get divorced here, I have to get divorced through the Rabbinate even though I didn't have a Jewish wedding.

Word.

Another commenter on S's post basically told her to stop blaming Israel for her problems. Why shouldn't we blame Israel? G-d forbid we criticize the country we live in!! Israel, unlike other countries, gets bashed left-right-and-center in the press but if one of us says one bad word about the country we live in, the inhabitants jump all over us! Ya know what?!? Some of our issues CAN be blamed on Israel.

Do I feel better about being a Jew living in Israel? No. Do I feel like this is easier? Absolutely not. I've had cartons of milk and stones thrown at me for not being dressed a certain way. I've been spat on for walking next to a man. I've been called a whore for being in the wrong area. All of this was done by my own people. One man once told me, while I was pregnant, that I was dressed inappropriately as I walked to work in Bnei Brak. In the four years I've worked in that area, no one has ever made a comment but my comment back to him was simple "it's a bigger sin for you to look at me than it is for me to dress this way - why are you looking at me?" He then spat on the ground and walked away. (FYI, I was dressed in a dress that hit at my knees and my shoulders were completely covered)

I once wrote a post about what it's like living in Israel - because I get a lot of questions about living here. My post explained the bittersweet feelings most immigrants have. I have a great inner-circle of friends, some great family members, but this place doesn't always feel like home. I love that the receptionists at the dentist ask to see pictures of Yoav and I love that the lady at the local ministry of interior office brought over three other women to say a mi sheberach (prayer for the sick) when I told her about Yoav's ptosis. But I don't love other things about this country and I believe those things should be worked on. Using Israel's security as an excuse for not putting more money towards other things is just that, it's an excuse. Two Holocaust survivors in my building can barely afford their lives here. They lived through hell once, then lived it again when they came here. Now that they are in their 80s, the live on cheese and bread. One neighbor dumpster dives in the early morning when he thinks no one is outside.

Life here isn't perfect - life anywhere isn't perfect but we all need an outlet to vent our frustrations. I commend S for voicing hers. She made it public where many people keep it bottled up. She should be commended, not tormented.

Whiny Anglos ATTACK... with blue and white baseball bats.