Fathers and Parenting

Do NOT take my thermometer away.

Last night, after an especially grueling day (I'll get to that in a minute), I read the saddest blog post about witnessing bad parenting. If you have a minute, or five, head over to the post at Single Dad Laughing (by Dan Pearce) - he has some words of advice for fathers. His post hit me really hard because I've seen it happen a million times and I just don't get it.

The basics of the post are that some people shouldn't be allowed to breed. I get it, we get frustrated with our kids because we're having a bad day or they just don't know when to give up but we're parents, aren't we supposed to rise above it? Yo has had so many meltdowns at Costco/Meijer/Target but I do one of two things: a) leave the store I'm at or b) carry on and ride it out. I don't get angry at him for being frustrated. While I DO apologize to the people around me (as I try not to act oblivious to his tantrums), I don't believe in scolding him for going through something completely natural at 16-months-old.

Hello Yogurt, meet Mom's shirt.

Still, I see plenty of parents do it. While walking through Target with Yo last week, I watched a woman spend 25 minutes scolding her kid (seriously, why invest THAT much energy as you run through a store???) - she went from department to department telling her child to stop being so whiny, stop fidgeting, stop crying, stand up straight...etc. Your kid is maybe four-years-old? WTH, lady?? There are better uses of your time and energy and if your kid is SUCH a burden to you - why did you become a parent?

There is a big difference between being a parent and having a kid. There are times where I feel like a horrible parent because I didn't get home in time to say goodnight to Yo or I get frustrated when he throws yogurt at me (yeah, THAT happened). But I didn't have kids to sit on the sidelines. Some days are better than others.

Hellooooo Poopy-face.

With Father's Day coming up, I guess this post hit me hard. Craig already received his Father's Day gifts (one from me, one from Yoavi). He deserves so much more. He deserves everything he wants for our new house. He really does. Craig is an exceptional father and I would not have been able to get this whole house thing sorted without him. That bad day I mentioned earlier? Well, I threw my back out AND I have some kind of random virus that won't go away.  It makes it hard to do the things Moms do - like carry her child or even change a diaper.

Throwing my back out was one thing but I don't enjoy being sick. I'm a worker-bee and I bust my ass at work but apparently you can't work 60-hours a week, start moving into your house, AND try to be a good mom without something breaking. In this case, I'd rather be sick than miss work or Yoav.

I couldn't do any of it without Craig and he deserves so much more than I'm giving right now. It's true. He's a great Dad and Yo is lucky to have him as his Dad. I've seen worse. On top of it, I'M lucky - I have two amazing Dads that have helped out so much over the last few weeks when we've needed it. Without my step-dad, our house wouldn't be painted and we wouldn't have found an awesome handyman. Without my Dad, we'd have old locks, bad plumbing, and our appliances would still be in the middle of my kitchen. While things are still being sorted and finished, I'm so grateful to them for helping us along the way.

This is not to say my two Moms didn't help - they did. Believe me, they did. Whether it was giving us furniture, feeding us, or watching Yo - they helped. Their help allowed me more time to see this face more often: